Afternoon Tea

Last weekend I attended my third afternoon tea, & I'm here to tell you, I'm sold.  Even days later, I still find myself fantasizing about scones, clotted cream, & strawberry jam.  Barring real ale & perhaps baked beans for breakfast, I'm hard-pressed to come up with a British tradition I enjoy more than afternoon tea.

 The Landmark's finest

Don't let the name fool you.  Afternoon tea is far more than a cuppa.  Each of those I've experienced was three courses in total.  The savory round, which consists of various types of finger sandwiches, comes first, thankfully.  This is a boon, because, preparation for afternoon tea runs along the same lines as Thanksgiving dinner, i.e. fasting all morning & afternoon.  By the time the food's arrived, it's all I can do to keep from double-fisting.  Sandwich offerings are fairly consistent.  I've seen chicken salad, egg salad (called egg mayo here) with cress, smoked salmon, mozzerella & pesto, roast beef & horseradish, & of course, the coveted cucumber.

 Not even for ready money.

Scones make up the second course, usually a basket of plain & another of currant.  These are traditionally accompanied by clotted cream & jam, though not necessarily in that order; in the Mooring camp, there's some dispute about which is spread onto the scone first.  Much to my regret, I never tasted clotted cream until I came to England.  Would that America knew how decadently toothsome it is.  CC's not just a one-trick pony either.  I've seen also seen it on the table served as accompaniment for other desserts too.  The British love dairy with their pudding.

Check out the napkin, folded into a lotus basket. Straight class.

The final spread means pastries, but that's something of a misrepresentation, since they've been there all along.  Probably the hangover of some torturous Victorian exercise in restraint, the desserts are featured on the table from the outset, daring you to breach decorum & gobble one up out of turn.  Although I gush about the scones, pastries tend to be the most impressive part of tea.  They're the one part of the meal not so confined by the tradition menu, so creativity & extravagance make for some beautiful plates.

That macaron was ridiculous.

My one beef with the pastry course is that it's last.  Restraining myself during first & second waves, inevitably, presents a problem, & I'm left weighing the discomfort of over-stuffing my craw against the dainty goodness of a bite-sized lemon tart, with it's delicate, golden-brown peaks of meringue.  It's a tough life sometimes.

I couldn't possibly have another cake.

As yet, I've sampled the Lanesborough, the Langham, & the Landmark for tea (all the best places are 5-star hotels with names beginning "Lan-").  Each had its charms, & I'd gladly return to any of them.  Fortunately, the Mooring ladies have offered to take me for my birthday, so 9 months down the road, you can anticipate a follow-up post featuring more delicious scones!  In the interim, let me know if you'd like to go to tea during your visit (hint, hint).  I'm always game.